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top 22 things NOT to say to police officer!

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1. I can’t reach my license unless you hold my beer.

2. Sorry, Officer, I didn’t realize my radar detector wasn’t plugged in.

3. Aren’t you that guy from the Village People?

4. Hey, you must have been doin’ at least 120 mph to keep up with me…Good job!

5. Excuse me…is stick up hyphenated?

6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a cop.

7. I almost decided to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.

8. Bad cop! No donut!

9. You’re not gonna check the trunk, are you?

10. Gee, that gut sure doesn’t inspire confidence.

11. Didn’t I see you get your ass kicked on COPS?

12. Wow, you look just like the guy in the picture on my girlfriend’s nightstand.

13. Is it true that people become cops because they’re too dumb to work at McDonald’s?

14. I pay your salary!

15. So, uh, you on the take, or what?

16. Gee, Officer…that’s terrific…the last officer only gave me a warning too!

17. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.

18. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around-that’s how far ahead of me they are.

19. What do you mean, “Have I been drinking?” You’re the trained specialist.

20. Well, when I reached down to pick up my bag of crack, my gun fell off my lap and got lodged between the brake pedal and the gas pedal, forcing me to speed out of control.

21. Hey, is that a 9 mm? That’s nothing compared to this .44 Magnum.

22. Hey, can you give me another one of those full cavity searches?

Cool (6) Fail (14) Funny (15) Gross (3) Sad (5) Stupid (8) WTF (10)

Categories: Text
  1. chub
    May 9th, 2010 at 07:39 | #1

    this is better then surveys

  2. fuk off am i telling u m name
    May 13th, 2010 at 09:08 | #2

    these r shit

    May 13th, 2010 at 11:25 | #3

    these are sooooo bad. not even a slight smirk came across my face… once…

  4. kristi
    May 14th, 2010 at 10:30 | #4

    i think its funnyy!!! :b

  5. bahaha cool as :L
    May 16th, 2010 at 13:56 | #5

    these were hilarious bahaha

  6. el niggero
    May 19th, 2010 at 03:04 | #6


  7. Anonymous
    December 2nd, 2010 at 02:54 | #7

    there funny