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The Ten Things Men ♥ Love ♥ about Women.

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Most men really, really like women.
That may seem a bit like telling you that water is wet, but it’s true. If there is a God, men should bow down and thank him for blessing us with such beautiful creatures in the opposite sex. Of course, we usually aren’t shy about showing our gratitude: We tend to turn into slobbering piles of putty when a woman does just about anything. It’s not always the scandalously mini miniskirt or the cleavage-baring V-neck that does it (and this is by no means a call to outlaw these wonderful things). Instead, it’s often the little, innocuous actions and displays that have the biggest effect on men.
Read on for the top 10 little things a woman does that drives us crazy.

Number 10
She goes for the heart through the stomach
All that fluffy talk about the sensuality of food contains morsels of truth, especially when the sweaty, apron-clad woman making it is doing so purely for your benefit. And it won’t just be the kitchen that’ll heat up if you start feeding each other with your hands. So eat up and enjoy. If you thank her the right way, you might even get out of doing the dishes.

Number 9
Her nipples stand up, and she lets them show
Jennifer Aniston’s permanently erect nipples were one of the only things that made watching Friends tolerable for dutiful boyfriends across North America. Breasts are like ice cream sundaes to men, and the mind-blowing hint of hard nipples isn’t just the cherry: It’s more like the whip cream, the chocolate sauce, the chopped nuts, the caramel sprinkles, and the cherry on top. They’re a sneak preview of what lies beneath, and they fill our heads with delicious imagery. So take off the damn sweater, please.

Number 8
She gives us the look
Most guys give just about every girl they come across the cursory once-over, but when that gaze is returned with a sultry, suggestive look, let’s just say it immediately causes a tingling sensation “down there.” With one such subtle glance, all the built-up stress and tension of the hunt is released. It confirms everything that was hoped for and gives the green light to swoop in for the kill. And nothing is hotter than that.

Number 7
She puts on lip gloss
Women think men love the soft, shiny lips that result from wearing lip gloss. In reality, we just love watching them put it on. In fact, why hasn’t someone made a three-hour DVD devoted to girls applying lip balm, lipstick or anything else of that ilk? The head slyly tilted back, the mouth just slightly agape, the eyes closed — what isn’t sexy about that image?

Number 6
She dresses down
Give any girl a platinum card and six hours in front of a mirror, and she’ll end up looking fantastic. But the real test (along with the real turn-on) is how a woman looks without designer jeans or makeup. If a girl can look downright hot in her laidback duds, it speaks to her natural beauty and shows that she has the capacity to be low maintenance. You can keep your Calvin Klein- and M.A.C-aided diva; I’ll take the casual cutie with her hair tucked into a bun, bralessly wearing a worn-out shirt.

Number 5
She talks blue out of the blue
No one likes a potty mouth. In fact, it’s kind of a turnoff when a girl drops nonstop F-bombs. But when a normally prim and proper young lass loses herself in the moment and let’s something downright nasty slip from her mouth, it can crank the heat up to dizzying levels.

Number 4
She hits the gym
Maybe it’s the skimpy shorts and sports bras. Or it could be the grunts and labored, sweaty breathing. It may even be the litany of compromising exercises that get women bent into a breathtaking array of flexibility-testing positions. Whatever the reason, women somehow manage to turn a trip to the gym into a hot and heavy foreplay session. At least they did until some prude came up with “women only” gyms, and robbed men of the only reason they had to go in the first place.

Number 3
She gets close to a friend on the dance floor
Two girls grinding on the dance floor is a lot like wrestling: Even though you know it’s all fake, you still can’t help but like it. It doesn’t take a study by Kinsey to figure out why men are blown away by this sight. Sweaty, drunk girls groping each other, the air charged with sexual energy %u2011- and it’s not even happening on DVD! Inevitably, some doughhead will ruin it for everyone by trying to sneak into the middle, but can you really blame him?

Number 2
She gives a sneak peek at the goods
Men are very easily visually aroused — that’s why porn is a multi-billion-dollar industry. So catching an unintended glimpse of a girl’s “unmentionables” immediately gets the hormones flowing. Catching a peek at a lacy thong or watching the seductive trip of a dress strap as it fortuitously slips off a shoulder can do more for the libido than the raunchiest full frontal ever could.

Number 1
She suggests watching something dirty
Most men aren’t particularly proud of their porn obsession (pornographers are just so good at marketing it to us!). So it goes without saying that having a girl suggest a “blue movie” is as big a relief as it is a turn-on. Who doesn’t get charged up watching beautiful professionals pleasuring each other while doing some pleasuring of their own? Dirty flicks also provide lots of great ideas and suggestions (along with a bit of penis envy) and can keep things super-steamy for hours. Bonus: You can watch her searching for the right movie at the store for a glimpse into those closet ideas she isn’t quite ready to reveal yet.

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  1. pharoah_meltii
    May 15th, 2010 at 06:19 | #1

    who the fuck puts LIPSTICK ON WITH HER EYES CLOSED. WTF

  2. Anonymous
    May 15th, 2010 at 07:12 | #2

    Lol, If I tried I’d stab my self in the eye

  3. Angelica
    May 15th, 2010 at 10:02 | #3

    #8- “when that gaze is returned with a sultry, suggestive look…” wtf? Sometimes, maybe. But I’ve seen girls who all they do it that, and it looks like their face is broken

  4. George
    May 15th, 2010 at 13:00 | #4

    might not be good for lipstick maybe, but it does work for lip gloss, very much so

  5. evalina
    May 15th, 2010 at 18:25 | #5

    wth!!!

  6. Anonymous
    May 15th, 2010 at 19:58 | #6

    half of that is just plain sick

  7. sdfsfd
    May 15th, 2010 at 20:00 | #7

    CHEEESSEEee

  8. xxz
    May 15th, 2010 at 23:58 | #8

    this is stupid XD

  9. Anonymous
    May 16th, 2010 at 17:26 | #9

    wth is with all the fucking sex things?!!

  10. Person
    May 17th, 2010 at 10:53 | #10

    Cuz a guy wrote it~ Retard.

  11. jennifer
    July 14th, 2010 at 02:26 | #11

    agreed . . . I however am grateful that my guy prefers my personality rather than my looks . . . Here is some advice . . . Girls that wear cloths so tight that you could see the mint date of a dime in the back pocket have no self respect . . . it shows that all they want is someone who wants them for their looks . . . wear cloths that fit and flatter you . . . not to loose or too tight